Wednesday, January 4, 2017

Top Things to Joke About in 2017

Happy New Year!

Thank God 2016 is finally over.  Now we have a whole new year of things to complain about.  And when it comes to complaining no one does it better than comedians.  We are constantly using social trends, news events, and new technologies as fodder for our new jokes.  And while no one knows what the future holds there are some things that we can expect to happen in 2017 that we know will be easy targets of jest.  Wether it be on stage, or just social media here are a look at the top things you can expect comedians to make fun of in 2017.

#10 Social Media Itself
Remember MySpace?  Its that thing Robert Downey Jr. mentioned in the first Iron Man Movie.  Now it's been replaces with Facebook, Twitter, and Instagram.  Not to mention a dozen other various sites that I can't keep up with because I'm not a 16-year-old girl with unlimited time.  If there's one thing they all have in common it's that people always move on to the next thing, then make fun of those that are still using the old thing.  Expect the same with social media.  Will Twitter and Facebook be gone by 2018?  Probably not, but I wouldn't be surprised if the hashtag #youstilltwitter becomes a thing, or it would if hashtags were still a thing. #youstillhashtag

#9 Brexit and the Breakdown of the EU
In June 2016 many people in England woke up to realized that they had broken up with their EU girlfriend the night before, and now there's no getting back together.  The decision to leave the European Union will be a long and messy process which will take several years, but will begin in March with the start of exit talks.  How is this going to be funny?  Well for one thing it's not clear if it will be a "hard" Brexit or a "soft" Brexit.  So there are the obvious penis jokes about pulling out.  It might be hacky, but it's still funny.

#8 ISIS and the Middle East
Yes, Syria and the rest of the Middle East is a crap fest right now, and there are no signs of it getting any better.  If anything it is going to get worse.  So why is it on this list?  Well it isn't.  ISIS is.  ISIS is the new Nazi, and if there's anything we comedians love it's a target everyone loves to hate.  The fact that ISIS isn't known for taking a joke makes them even more of a target.  We just have to make sure the comedy focus on the people and not the religion that they claim to represent.  We don't want another Muhammed Cartoon incident now do we?

#7 Virtual Reality
2016 was the year that Virtual Reality arrived in the home.  With the Oculus Rift, Playstation VR, and a handful of other VR headsets making their debut.  Now that the technology is finding it's footing it's only a matter of time before things like virtual porn become a a thing.  Bringing with it a whole new meaning to playing with your joystick.
Virtual Reality also has a learning curve for new audiences which means a lot of VR fails.  We've already seen a handful of videos of people crashing into things while wearing VR headsets go viral online.  Expect some VR memes to follow.

#6  Star Wars Episode VIII
Word on the internet is that Mark Hamill is actually going to have to speak to earn his paycheck this time.
After the success of The Force Awakens and Rouge One, you can expect a year long hype for this much anticipated addition to the Star Wars Universe.  It will be sad that this will be Carrie Fisher's swan song, but in good taste or bad there will be a lot of jokes about bringing her back in CG form like they did in Rouge One.
Personally I'm going to focus my jokes on Kylo Ren - aka Ben Solo.  Particularly about how a character with two such good looking parents ended up turning out so ugly?  No wonder he decided to wear a helmet and turn to the dark side.

#5 Nintendo Switch
It's been a rough few years for Japan's favorite Italian plumber.  Nintendo has found itself a distant third place in the video game wars.  In March the company is revealing it's new Switch consul to compete with the XBox One and Playstation 4.
The gimmick is it's a home consul that you can take with you on the go.  So now when mom's tell there kids to play outside and get some fresh air the kids can take their video games with them and play them at the park.
What's really interesting is Japan has made Mario part of the advertising for the 2020 olympics in Tokyo, and if the Nintendo switch is a failure then you can expect a lot of jokes about the olympic committee considering a Playstation mascot instead.  Might I suggest Kratos from "God of War".

#4 Russia
Remember when the Cold War ended?  Well, Vladimir Putin doesn't.  The guy seems to have spent the last couple decades building a really long sharp stick which he is now using to poke the United States.  From screwing with our election, to threatening another nuclear arms race, Russia is making things feel like the 80's again.  While it's easy to make fun of the former KGB Putin, the fact that he is so friendly with Donald Trump makes him all the more a target.  Personally I can't wait for pictures of the two riding horseback together while shirtless.

#3 Drones
The future is here and it is making people lazy.  After the success of Amazon drones delivering packages, other companies are getting in on the action, which could means 2017 could be the year pizza and beer literally drops from the sky like mana from heaven.  Even Walmart is getting in on the action, meaning those people who shop there at 2am are going to lose their last excuse for getting out of the house.

#2 Binge Worthy TV
It took 6 years of boobs and bloods, but Winter has finally come to Westeros.  And it brought with it Daenerys Targaryen and her dragons.   The seventh season of Game of Thrones is expected to be such a major TV event the 2018 Emmy's have already started putting their name on the trophies.  The show is as awesome to watch as it is easy to make fun of, so you can expect a lot of fun poked at the show as well as the fans, and probably George R. R. Martin once he finds out that no one wants to read books after they've already seen the movie (or in this case TV show).
Similarly you can expect jokes directed at any other binge worthy TV show, such as the Walking Dead, and of Marvel's Netflix shows, and House of Cards.  Particularly the latter as it gets compared to the number one butt of all jokes for 2017...

#1 "President" Donald Trump

A comedian making a joke about Donald Trump is like an executioner being asked to behead a giraffe.  There is so much material to work with you don't know where to start.   Yes, he prefers a 3am tweet over a press release.  Yes, he is endorsed by the KKK, and hired their hero Steve Bannon to be his top advisor.  Yes, he's thrice married, has a history of trolling beauty pageant changing rooms, and he seems to want to bang his daughter.  Yes, he's sexist, racist, xenophobic, and elitist.  But if that wasn't enough there is all the illegal stuff he's done.  He's a tax dodging, bankruptcy filing, fraud settling, pussy grabbing, Russian ball fondling, antitrust violating, Cuba Embargo breaking, accused rapist.
He's like the drunk uncle from Thanksgiving who has the influence of a billionaire and now the power of the President of the United States. It would make for a hilarious movie, but is terrifying as a reality.  That's why it's all the more important to laugh at the fear.  It's the only way we are going to survive the next four years with any sanity.
To give you an idea of just how big of a joke Donald Trump will be in the coming months, one of the hot joke gifts of the holiday season was toilet paper with his face on it.  Proof that Donald Trump is going to catch a lot of crap from everyone.