Monday, January 3, 2011

A Zanie look at comedy


Recently I had the privilege of performing at Zanies Comedy club in Chicago as part of their Rising Star Showcase.  Zanies is one of the oldest and most respected comedy chains in the country.  In the past three decades it has hosted every major name in the comedy industry from Rodney Dangerfield to Jerry Seinfeld.  Today the club continues to thrive with sold out shows headlined by the biggest stars of the club circuit and featuring some of the most promising new talent.

The man in charge of finding that talent is Bert Haas.  He is the Executive Vice President of Zanies and is responsible for booking comedians for the club.  Haas personally oversees the Rising Star showcase.  The showcase allows new talent like myself to show him what what we can do, but the showcase spots are in high demand and Haas doesn't waste time with comics who don't take it seriously.

I was one of 8 comics who were offered a spot on the showcase.  The show was scheduled to start at 8:30, but we were all told to be at the club by 7:30.  One comic showed up at 7:32 and was politely told that he was too late and wouldn't be able to perform that night.  Those of us who did show up on time had the privileged of listening to Haas who spent a half hour discussing what he expected out of us as comedians as well as his advice on what young comics need to do to become a success in the industry.

I recorded the conversation and have included parts of it below with Haas's permission.  It includes great advice for any comic who is starting out, and an interesting insight into the industry.




Bert Haas
Zanies Comedy Clubs Inc.



Stick to your time

"Out of respect for the club, out of respect to me, out of respect to your fellow performers do your time.  It's part of the art of showcasing to know what you're going to do and to get it in the time frame that you need to do it in.  When you guys do your first Tonight Show set they will ask you to do 4 1/2 minutes.  They mean 4 1/2 minutes.  They're not going to hold a commercial so that you can get your last bit in.  Get in the habit of knowing your time and doing it."



Performance

"The best advice I can give you for performing in general and showcasing in particular:  Exit gracefully.  "Thank you and goodnight."  If you get an applause break at 5 1/2 say "Thank you and goodnight".  It's not going to get any better.  If at 5 1/2, you haven't had any laughs...  It happens.  I've seen the best comedians have off sets... If at 5 1/2 you haven't had any laughs say thank you and goodnight.  If you didn't get them in the first 5 1/2 you're not going to get them in the last 30 seconds."



The Roles in Comedy

"Lets understand what our roles are.  My role is not to be your friend.  My role is not to be your mentor.  My role is to make money for Zanies comedy clubs.  As long as Zanies makes money I have a job, I get my annual bonus.  Your job is not to be the next great comedian.  It's great to keep that in mind, but your goal right now is to make money.  And if that means you have to make compromises, then make those compromises.  It's great to be a starving artist when you're in your 20's.  It's noble.  It's not noble to be a starving artist when you have a wife and kids.  You want to make money always keep that in mind."





Working Clean

"I think at this stage of your career you should all be working clean.... I suggest you work clean because there's more money to be made working clean.  I know you're going to say "Oh yeah, but we've seen those Comedy Central specials and everybody is dirty.  Louie C. K works dirty and Sarah Silverman is dirty and they're all dirty.  Maybe their dirty now because that's their character, but that doesn't mean they started that way.  They started out by crafting jokes and then they found their voice.  Lewis Black:  of course you expect Lewis Black to swear.  That's his character.  Jake Johannsen doesn't have to work dirty.  Brian Regan has never worked dirty and they're also successful.  You don't have to work dirty to be successful.
Think about where the money is.  Cruise ships absolutely insist you work clean.  Corporates insist you work clean.  Most national TV shows, they're going to make you work clean.  Certainly when you first audition for them.  You might as well just get in the habit of doing it." 



Showcasing

"No matter what happens keep showcasing.  If you don't like to showcase, if it offends you, if it upsets you, get out of the business right now.  You're going to showcase the rest of your lives.  You're going to audition for plays.  You're going to read for movie parts.  You're going to showcase for other comedy clubs.  You'll be showcasing for the rest of your lives.  You might as well just get used to it." 



Career 

"Don't ever judge your career against another comedians.  Because if you do you're just going to end up killing yourself.  There will always be someone who gets on the Tonight Show before you do, or earns more money than you, or gets that movie that you though you were perfect for.  Its always going to happen.... Bo Burnham earned more last year then all of us in this room combined.  He's 20.  It would be really easy to say I'm a failure because I'm not Bo Burnham.  Don't.  Different people's careers go at different speeds.

Pick a date one day of the year.  Sit down and write down your goals for the next 12 months.  And then every three or six months you go back to make sure you're on track.  At the end of 12 months you look at your goals from the previous year.  Am I doing better now than I was 12 months ago?  Am I performing more sets every week.  Do I have more material?  Am I making more money?  Do I know more bookers?  Did I finish that screen play I started?  If you answer yes to 3 of those you're making progress.  You're doing better.  And then you make goals for the next year and you go through the same thing every year."

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